4 Truths of Being Human That I Noticed When I Dyed My Hair Blue.

Posted on Posted in How to Love & Be Loved.


Recently I dyed my hair blue.

I did it for one reason, and one reason alone: because I felt like it.

I’m a chronic, glorious over-thinker. I practice yoga pretty much every day, in addition to other forms of exercise, to get out of my mind and back into my physical body. Yet, if I’m being honest, I am someone who easily lives inside of my head.

So I dyed my hair blue, and I decided to not over-think it. To be fair, I had to make the appointment, and I did have a week or so when I could have cancelled it, so it wasn’t exactly as spontaneous as that stripe of green Manic Panic I did in my friend’s bathroom the summer before 9th grade. Still, it felt spontaneous and fun. I felt fun.

In my “real life,” I’m a mom to two children, a wife, a writer, and a handful of other roles that I can claim. These days, however, “Mom” is the role that I wear first and foremost, since my kids are small and physically dependent on me.

My oldest daughter ecstatically matched her dress to my hair when I came home from the salon. For days afterward, she would lose what she was talking about when she looked at me, instead stopping mid-sentence and uttering “blue” while staring at my hair.

She’s too young to care what her friends think about it. I’m mainly home all day. It seemed like the perfect time to do something so simple, and yet so freeing mentally.

I learned these things from randomly dying my hair blue at age 36:

1. People don’t compliment each other enough.

Many people have told me that they love my hair, and even that they’re jealous of it. Many people, too, have said nothing at all. I mentioned to my sister that this silence can, I guess, be taken for disapproval. I told her that I genuinely don’t care, since I (and my husband, and my girls) love it. She offered that, in her experience, people in general don’t offer sincere compliments like I do.

I believe in compliments. There’s no real downside to handing them out when they’re heartfelt, and, equally, most of us could use the practice in receiving them. (Here’s a tip: just say “thank you”—that’s it, “thank you.”)

2. Self-love really is internal.

If we’re looking outside of ourselves for approval and self-love, then every single time we will not find it. Loving ourselves truly starts within.

3. Children are hilarious.

As an overall rule, I believe that hair is an accessory to have fun with. In this spirit, I’ve done a lot of different things with my hair. One of my favorite ways I’ve worn it is full-on platinum blonde. I’d almost forgotten how children loved my platinum hair, until I was reminded of it after dying it blue.

My husband couldn’t stop laughing, as we were walking from the parking lot into the grocery store, and he saw an-about-3-year-old child press his face against the glass of a minivan to see me better.

4. Nothing is forever.

I lament this often—that nothing is for forever.

These days with my young children can be challenging, but their childhoods go by so quickly. I think back also on my marriage, and on us dating as kids, and how fast these years together are moving.

Hair? It’s important. To say that hair is not important would not be fully understanding how people use their appearances as an art of self-expression. Regardless, it’s all temporary, and the blue washing out of my hair slowly is another reminder of this. More, it’s a remembrance to live my life each day as best as I can. Some days, assuredly, I’m better at it than others. But I have this one life, and I want to display to my two children how much more I enjoy it when I don’t take myself too seriously.

13 thoughts on “4 Truths of Being Human That I Noticed When I Dyed My Hair Blue.

  1. Love, love, love this article, Jennifer. I’ve complimented people all my life because it just comes out of my mouth. And MOSTLY about their hair. =) I especially love gray hair and at 65 my hubby barely has any. And I compliment teens on their different hair. AND I have fine, straight, oily, ANNOYOING hair that I HAVE to wash every single day or I look like a bag lady. I’m a retired teacher that misses the kids SO much. If it strikes me, I compliment. I’m reposting your post all over the place!! =) My daughter is 35 with a 3 & 7 year old. =) LOVE YOUR HAIR JENNIFER!!!

    1. Jean, you have absolutely no idea what your feedback means to me. On so many levels, you have truly touched me. Thank you!

      It’s wonderful and relieving to hear that there are others out there who freely give out compliments, and who notice the importance of doing this. Hands down, this was my favorite thing that came out of publishing this post. Thank you also for sharing. As an indie writer, that support is huge.

      Thank you again for making my day. xo

  2. I think it’s wonderful that you dyed your hair just because you felt like it. It’s important to do things for ourselves from time to time! I do have one question though: Where did you get the dye job done? I’d love to do my hair in blue like this, and I would really appreciate any suggestions! Thanks in advance and keep being awesome!

    1. Thanks! I go to my local salon/my color goddess guru. Personally, I love Pravana and I wouldn’t do it at home. Check out a professional salon and ask a lot of questions. Good luck!

  3. This is the best! I dyed mine purple for all the same reasons. I had the same experiences as you. I’m a little nervous about doing it again since I just accepted a kindergarten teaching position. More nervous about the administration and parents than the kids. But it’s just hair. It will grow.

    1. Thank you so much!

      One of the reasons I decided to do a bright color is because it’s not as long-lasting, and I was dying my long hair that, for the first time in awhile, was all my own/natural. This said, I now lament that the color washes out more easily than “natural” color, and I have to keep it up—because I’m in love with it and don’t plan on stopping soon. Congrats on the new job!

  4. I read this post on HelloGiggles. First, I love the blue hair! I have done many colors in my past but have two kids (8 and 2 year old girls) and have been apprehensive to do funky colors because I’m “mom”. Maybe I could add a fun chunk in there and see how it goes.
    Second, I too give compliments to people all the time. Whenever I see anything at all I think is interesting, pretty , funny, etc. I make sure to tell the person no matter the age, gender or whatever. I also look out for people that look like they could use a compliment -which, let’s face it, is most people these days. My older daughter has told me it’s one of her favorite things about me and something she wants to do.

    Thank you for the great article! ?

    1. Thank you for reading and for this feedback. It’s so nice to hear.

      I’m a believer in embracing the vulnerability of being human in general, and in trying to make other people feel good when it’s deserved and the situation merits it (even if it makes us feel vulnerable ourselves to do so).

      (Side note: my kids love my hair, and I’ve been surprised at how it’s often the people I thought would disapprove of my hair that are envious!)

  5. As one blue haired mama to another I couldn’t agree more! I love my blue hair, it makes be so happy, but also love what it brings out in people. It starts a dialogue that usually touches on “if not now, then when?” I love when the conversation ends with people telling me they are going to do something for themselves that they have been putting off.

    1. Really great point. One thing I’ve noticed is that teenagers are chattier with me now! Maybe being a little funky with my hair will encourage and remind my own kids someday that mama’s okay to talk to. 😉 xo

  6. This totally made me happy to read. I have been growing and donating my hair for the past four years (which I love being able to do) but have decided that I would rather go purple than gray. I’m really beginning to look forward to this rather than lament the fact that as I grow ever closer to fifty I have a bit more tinsel rather than the chestnut I’ve enjoyed all of these years!

    1. Good for you for donating your hair! And for being open to changes. Embracing some spontaneity in life can feel really good,no? xo

  7. I dyed my hair blue. I loved it. My husband refused to look at me or speak to me for three days. I’m not sure what to do about that. I’ve never understood being embarrassed by someone else’s body. I love the acceptance you experienced. I miss the freedom to alter my appearance that I owned before marriage. What would you have done in my situation? I didn’t rush out and change it, I lasted a week. Then I chopped it off. Liked it even more. Spiky silver gray with blue tips. He hated it also, but it was so cool…

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