What You Didn’t See When You Looked at A “Skinny Mom”: A Response.

Jennifer

Jennifer is a voracious reader, obsessive writer, passionate yoga instructor and drinker of hoppy ales. She's also a devoted mama and wife (a stay-at-home yogi). She considers herself to be one of the funniest people that ever lived. In addition to her work on elephant journal and The Huffington Post, Jennifer has over 40 articles published on the wellness website MindBodyGreen and her column Your Personal Yogi ran in the newspaper Toledo Free Press. She holds a Bachelor's degree in geology, absolutely no degrees in anything related to literature, and she currently owns a wheel of cheese. Her books, The Best Day of Your Life and The Art of Parenting: Love Letters from a Mother are available on Amazon or Barnes & Noble. Connect with her on Facebook, Twitter, Google+ .

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4 Responses

  1. Christine says:

    thank you for this post! I’m not a mom but I’m skinny, it’s my body type and I cannot be another… And it’s sometimes very difficult for me to accept my body with all the “skinny sharing” everywhere, all those people who see me like a woman with an eating disorder or so..

  2. Amber says:

    The article you are referring to isn’t about you or your experience of your body. You sound lucky and happy, which is great. The article on scary mommy was autobiographical, about a Different woman’s experience her body.

    • Kate says:

      That may be the case, but it wasn’t written as an autobiographical experience. It was written saying “this is what’s really going on when you look at a skinny mom.” That was the type of language and the framework the original author used. If she had written in the first person and made it about herself instead of offering it up as a truth about what skinny moms are actually going through, it would have been a much less offensive, much more helpful article. As it is, it feeds into incredibly offensive body shaming stereotypes. Sorry…not all skinny women are starving themselves or full of self loathing.

    • Jennifer says:

      Kate summarized eloquently my thoughts and the express reasons for writing this response. However, I’d like to note one more problematic aspect of this article.

      As a writer, I’ve spent my career sharing myself with people while simultaneously practicing healthy boundaries for both myself and my family. I’m also committed as a writer to producing heartfelt, helpful work that isn’t being published solely for “clicks” or “views.” Specifically, the way that this post is written—from a jealous woman’s perspective, rather than courageously as a “skinny mom” with, clearly, some eating disorder/body image issues—preys upon a population of insecure, jealous women who perhaps covertly want this to be what “skinny moms” are going through. In short, it’s written manipulatively and this invalidates it as a helpful, vulnerable share because it’s the opposite of vulnerable. It’s the opposite of a powerful, autobiographical piece. This is truly an issue for me, and for other writers, who do actually share vulnerable, realistic, yet ultimately useful material with the world.

      And, additionally and not lastly, eating disorders are not a joke. They aren’t something to beg sympathy for or get views for or mock. More, many “skinny moms” practice self love, and to equate, as I state clearly within this article, “skinny” with “eating disorder” isn’t helpful to healing eating disorders and, frankly, this article isn’t about a “mom” at all.

      Let’s call a spade a spade.

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