If you give a mom a snow day, she’s going to wish that her husband had the day off, too, so that she can sleep in.

If you give a mom more time in bed, she’s going to want breakfast in bed.

If you give a mom breakfast in bed, she’s going to want a shower. By herself.

If you give a mom a shower (by herself), she’s going to want hot coffee. Not lukewarm coffee that sat there after changing a poopy diaper or helping a kid to the bus.

If you give a mom a hot coffee, she’s going to want a book. Without pictures.

If you give a mom a book without pictures, she’s going to want to snuggle on the couch and read while the snow falls outside.

If you give a mom a blanket and let her snuggle, and read a book without pictures, and watch the falling snow, she’s going to want a nap.

If you give a mom a nap, she’s going to want to sleep for the whole afternoon because she’s freaking exhausted from waking up butt-early every morning.

If you give a mom a nap that lasts an entire afternoon, then she’s going to wake up and want a glass of wine.

If you give a mom a glass of wine, she’s going to want another one.

If you give a mom a second glass of wine, she’s going to want someone else to watch the kids and make dinner,

If you give a mom permission to sip wine and park her butt on a chair, she’s going to want to stay there until Downton Abbey comes on. Then she’s going to want chocolate squares with her wine.

If you give a mom chocolate squares and complete silence to watch Downton Abbey, she’s going to be happy—and she might even fall asleep on the couch, and have the strangest dream about a snow day…

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